Whistling Badger Blog

His name was Lon.  Looking back, he was a rather pathetic fifth grader with a big mouth who got a feeling of power by terrorizing younger kids.  But at the time, he was the Lord of the Neighborhood.  His word was law, and usually, his word was something frightening and humiliating.  He was a Big Kid.  And he had two big, dumb buddies to back him up. My dad didn't know about Lon when we made Jack O' Lantern Man.  It was just a fun thing to do:  Stuff a set of his coveralls, set the resulting body in a lawn chair, and put a pumpkin on top for a head.  It was my dad's creativity and love of taking things a step further that made him prop the old car speaker up behind Jack's head, with a wire hooked in that led up to a microphone in our upstairs window.  We could sit up there, in the dark, and give Jack a voice.  To the little ones, his voice was friendly and happy.  To the bigger kids, the ones who enjoy being scared just a bit, his voice was menacing (but still funny).

Today, I complete my forty-fifth trip around the sun.  If the numbers pan out, I should be about halfway to the finish line of this race we call life.  I'm happy to announce that some of the aid stations in this race have bacon.  And I'm pretty sure I'm on my way to a PR.  I've tried to keep my eyes open and pay attention along the way, and I have picked up a few lessons that I try to live by.   Here are 45 of them--just one per year, because that's about as fast as life-lessons can penetrate my skull. 1.  Determining the right thing is seldom complicated.  Doing the right thing is seldom easy. 2.  A person who will not ask for help in time of need is just as morally screwed-up as a person who will not offer it. 3. If you ever hear yourself saying, "God wants me to be happy," beware.  God wants you to be faithful.  The happiness will follow. 4.  Here's the cure for boredom:  Find something that needs done.  Go to it. 5.  There

Setting:   An empty cafeteria, with a large window looking out upon a starry sky. Two armored Imperial Storm Troopers walk into the room, chatting amicably, carrying lunch boxes.  They sit down and remove their helmets.  NC-217 is a young, blond man in his late teens.  PG-8115 is a few years older, with dark hair.  They open their lunch boxes and begin to eat. 217:  [Around mouthfuls of food] So, I had the craziest dream last night. 8115:  Yeah? 217:  Yeah.  You were in it, too.  There was this big rebellion against the Empire... 8115:  [Snorts loudly] Like that's gonna happen.  I'm telling you, kid, this Death Star is the key to peace in this galaxy.  Once we finish welding those blast grates over the thermal exhaust ports...Nobody's gonna make trouble now. 217:  Yeah, but in this dream, there was a rebellion, and get this--you and me were in it.  I think we were even some kind of leaders.  It was awesome--We got to fly around in fighters, be big h